I talked a couple friends into doing it with me and after weeks of synching our calendars, a couple player changes and a time change, we made an appointment for Sunday June 13. (I'm not even going to mention the last minute cancel by SOMEONE who apparently had TOO MUCH FUN the night before and couldn't join us because they came down with the brown bottle flu... yeah you know who you are!)
Cindy and I got to Emerald City Aerialdome in the Sodo area (6th and Lander) and we got signed up. Please note that the paperwork does include proof of health insurance, next of kin emer
gency contact and a death waiver. We were introduced to our instructors and 5 other "students" all there to "go flying". We started with a couple minutes of upper body stretches to get loose. Then the instructors fitted us with a belt which would later be attached to the safety cables. The instructors gave us a quick rundown of the program on the floor, to show us what they expected we would be doing on the trapeze. This expectation included a drop off a 30 foot high platform, fly thru the air, then kick your legs up to hook your knees on the bar, let go of bar to hang upside down, reach back (as if reaching for a partner "catch"), grab the bar again, drop your legs, pump your legs for more momentum, back flip off the bar and land in the net. "And everyone will do that three times. Now who wants to go first?" Huh, what...? Wait... I am going to need some more time to process this. Can't we do this in small steps?
gency contact and a death waiver. We were introduced to our instructors and 5 other "students" all there to "go flying". We started with a couple minutes of upper body stretches to get loose. Then the instructors fitted us with a belt which would later be attached to the safety cables. The instructors gave us a quick rundown of the program on the floor, to show us what they expected we would be doing on the trapeze. This expectation included a drop off a 30 foot high platform, fly thru the air, then kick your legs up to hook your knees on the bar, let go of bar to hang upside down, reach back (as if reaching for a partner "catch"), grab the bar again, drop your legs, pump your legs for more momentum, back flip off the bar and land in the net. "And everyone will do that three times. Now who wants to go first?" Huh, what...? Wait... I am going to need some more time to process this. Can't we do this in small steps?The first volunteer was a tiny little gal who did the whole sequence with perfection. Another petite
thing followed her and again, nailed it. Hmmm, seems easy enough. (Found out later that they were gymnasts/dancers/cheerleaders.... yeah...ok) Finally some other people went and I actually saw the same fear I was feeling. I saw the shaking legs, I saw the hesitation when being told to jump off the platform, I saw the angry concentration in their faces. OK, this is getting "real". I am nervous. My friend Cindy was next. She was a trooper. I could tell she was nervous getting up the ladder and I could see her silently contemplating how to make the transition from the ladder to the platform. But she did it with grace. The cables were attached to her belt and she went into position to grab the bar and make her first jump. I saw a little hesitation on the jump... one foot left the platform, then went right back. There was a little encouraging from the strong instructor and she went flying. She did great! I will admit that I was secretly glad she didn't get her knees on the bar for the upside down maneuver. Honestly I was getting tired of everyone nailing it and knowing I would probably NOT. So it made me feel a little better. (Shh, don't tell her I was thinking that...)
thing followed her and again, nailed it. Hmmm, seems easy enough. (Found out later that they were gymnasts/dancers/cheerleaders.... yeah...ok) Finally some other people went and I actually saw the same fear I was feeling. I saw the shaking legs, I saw the hesitation when being told to jump off the platform, I saw the angry concentration in their faces. OK, this is getting "real". I am nervous. My friend Cindy was next. She was a trooper. I could tell she was nervous getting up the ladder and I could see her silently contemplating how to make the transition from the ladder to the platform. But she did it with grace. The cables were attached to her belt and she went into position to grab the bar and make her first jump. I saw a little hesitation on the jump... one foot left the platform, then went right back. There was a little encouraging from the strong instructor and she went flying. She did great! I will admit that I was secretly glad she didn't get her knees on the bar for the upside down maneuver. Honestly I was getting tired of everyone nailing it and knowing I would probably NOT. So it made me feel a little better. (Shh, don't tell her I was thinking that...)Then it was my turn. I started my ascent up the ladder and immediately realized how shaky it was. Disturbing. The ladder rungs were tiny and I was in bare feet so it was imperative
to make sure the ball of my foot was placed perfectly on each rung for maximum support. This probably took more time than expected because the instructor on the platform actually had to look down to see if I was still there. It was about this time that I looked around and realized how high I was, and how it was going to be really scary on that platform. I basically froze up and went into retreat mode. I looked up at the instructor and said "no.... can't....". Then I cautiously made my way back down the ladder. I heard the other instructors telling me "come on, you were almost there", "don't look down", and "you can do it". But my mind was already made up, it wasn't happening. I got onto the ground and immediately started weeping. I was nervous, scared, embarrassed, and disappointed. I couldn't stop crying even when the instructors reassured me that it was ok, it happens, and I could try again whenever I felt ready.
to make sure the ball of my foot was placed perfectly on each rung for maximum support. This probably took more time than expected because the instructor on the platform actually had to look down to see if I was still there. It was about this time that I looked around and realized how high I was, and how it was going to be really scary on that platform. I basically froze up and went into retreat mode. I looked up at the instructor and said "no.... can't....". Then I cautiously made my way back down the ladder. I heard the other instructors telling me "come on, you were almost there", "don't look down", and "you can do it". But my mind was already made up, it wasn't happening. I got onto the ground and immediately started weeping. I was nervous, scared, embarrassed, and disappointed. I couldn't stop crying even when the instructors reassured me that it was ok, it happens, and I could try again whenever I felt ready. I sat down and let everyone go on their second swing on the trapeze. I watched everyone very carefully this time. I wanted to make sure I saw exactly how they went up the ladder and precisely how they got onto the platform. To me these were the biggest obstacles. I didn't even care about the jump/swing part. I knew that this girl would not be going upside down.... or doing any type of back summer sault dismount. But getting up the ladder, now that was the challenge. After that, I could simply hurl my self straight off the platform and be done with it all.
So, I tried again. I started climbing up the ladder. I got a little higher than the first time. I had a ton of encouragement from the instructors and students. But... I couldn't do it. I had to go back down. This time the frustration tears came more quickly. I went to the bathroom and sobbed a little harder. Why did I think I could do this? What is my problem - why do I have a paralyzing fear of heights? Maybe it's the fact that the last two months have been so emotional? Damn.
Enjoy the pictures of Cindy!
1 comment:
You know what, I can TOTALLY see this same thing happening to me... I think you did really well for even going there at all! You didn't let your fears stop you from trying something, and I think that's commendable! I wouldn't even have gone in the first place, so if we were competing for who is the brave one, you would definitely be the champ!!
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